Hook this

Saturday night, February 3rd was just another ordinary night in the NHL: Sidney Crosby had multiple points, Jacques Martin’s Panthers severely underachieved, the Rangers blew a big game, and an egregious amount of penalties were called. In the 14 games counting for 840 minutes (minus overtime), 156 minor penalties were whistled. That equals 312 penalty minutes and 37% of total hockey played was on the power play. Was scoring up? Of course not! The night averaged 4.71 goals per game and a whopping 5 of the 14 games ended in one team being shutout. Note, in the 2001-2002 season during the nefarious “old NHL”, the average goals per game was 5.3, more than half a goal higher. While goal scoring is fairly high this year (the night is not completely indicative), it is clear that last Saturday night, the few fans that watched hockey on TV, watched water-down rinky-dink power-play hockey. No wonder the league can’t fill seats. Memo to Mr. Bettman-more penalties slows the game down.

Of the 156 penalties, 92 were called for hooking, holding, interference, or tripping-fouls that now usually consist of a simple jersey pull, or a phantom tug. Note that there were only 12 fighting majors, 1/13th of the penalties called. Also, only 14 power play goals were scored which means that teams now put such a premium on penalty killing in order to combat, which is becoming such a ubiquitous part of the game. Learning from last year, teams know that they will be down many men each night and that if their penalty killing is solid they will probably win out.

Some veteran officials like Dan Marouelli, Dan O’Halloran, Brad Watson, and even at times Kerry Fraser maintain integrity for the game and for the most allow the game to flow, not making many penalty calls. However, there are too many young officials that because of the lack of guidance from NHL brass, are unsure of what is a penalty and try to make a name for themselves to impress their bosses (see Chris Rooney last year tossing Joe Thornton from his Boston reunion, his only visit to Boston for three seasons). Guys like Marouelli should hold leadership classes where they teach the younger guys about what should be a penalty. In addition, now with 17 minute intermissions and 2 minute TV timeouts, the last thing the game needs are more stoppages.

Some gripes:

• It shouldn’t be a slashing penalty when you slash for the puck and accidentally break the opponent’s stick. That is called hockey-you’re working hard to get to the puck and it never used to be a penalty. Sticks break during shots now. I could breathe on Ovechkin’s stick and it would break. Ok, that didn’t sound good.
• I’m sick and tired of the goalie interference penalty call when a goalie is hit outside the crease. A goalie is fair game outside the crease. Additionally, I wish refs would grow some balls and make the call when a goalie covers up the puck on say the faceoff dot-that is illegal and slows the game down. My first hockey moment was watching Alan Bester get decimated behind the net because he had left the crease-that’s hockey.
• How many regulation penalty shots are seen now? Unless the player is on a clear break and sodomized on the way to the net without getting a shot off, it should be called a hooking penalty.
• Can Walkom or whoever is really in charge of NHL officials make sure to assign a veteran staff to a big game. Sorry Chris Rooney, just because you’re related to Andy van Hellmond (who potentially cost the Nordiques the Stanley Cup in ’95 and disgracefully ended their last season in Quebec City with the awful major call based on Kovalev’s flop in the Eastern Quarters), doesn’t make you a good ref. Why Chris Rooney was officiating the Habs-Pens game on Sunday was beyond me, especially in light of their previous game which was a war to be euphemistic. Rooney nearly blew the game with an obscene “holding” call against Francis Bouillon who was merely fighting with Crosby to get the puck (the Pens scored, but lost in OT).
• Refs should be grouped similar to umpires in Major League Baseball and officials in basketball. Pairs should remain intact throughout the year and playoffs to provide continuity and the best refs should be paired with each other and ref the marquee games. Mike Hasenfrantz, who blew a major puck over the glass call at the Garden this year, which might have cost the Rangers two points, should not be reffing with esteemed veteran Bill McCreary, or any top games for that matter. The 10,500 that show up to Jobing.com arena daily can enjoy Mr. Hasenfrantz (fyi-love how before Montreal games they refer to refs as Monsieur so and so. Monsieur Hasenfrantz has a nice ring to it, even though he’s an absolute abomination).
• Enough with the mic’ed penalty announcements-this isn’t the NFL. Could you imagine Bill “Big Whistle” Chadwick reaching into his pocket to turn on a mike to announce a penalty? Please. Also notice how the younger refs love this part-I think they call penalties just to use the mic.
• Mick McGeough. This guy should be mopping up a Tim Hortons in Northeast Alberta-how this guy is still employed is beyond me. Not many people in pro sports drive others to call them “retarded” (see Craig MacTavish circa November ’06).

Look, hockey officials have it harder than any other refs. They have to skate quickly and make split second decisions during a sport that moves 100 miles per hour. That said, Walkom and the other numbnuts on 6th Avenue need to realize that less power plays equals more scoring and more excitement. Teams have found ways to cope with the new rules (See Jay Pandolfo and the Devils or Jacques Lemaire’s Wild) without taking penalties as MLB stars have found how to stay huge with HGH. Just let it be one huge free for all-that’s exciting. I’m sick and tired of watching half of each game be a power play. Now, to get people watching it? Stay tuned to this page…