Thursday, July 24, 2008

I'm a Douchebag (e5)


Some of our fellow hockey bloggers, who claim to have deep seated ties to the game, feel the need to waste everybody's time citing rumors that have a bullshit factor greater than Andrew Raycroft's GAA. As a regular feature, we'll calculate aforemetioned hockey blogger's rumor success rate and assess the likelihood of each.

July 24: 0-1

It was a slow day today in Narnia. Apparently Mats Sundin might go to the Habs? NFW!! Even though Mats said yesterday that he would make a decision on August 1, many of said blogger's "sources" are saying otherwise---these of course are the same voices in his head that said last week that Mats was a shoe-in for Vancouver.
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As a self-deprecating Ranger fan of twenty years, the team I've loved for so long is not making any progress quickly. Stuck with a lost coach, an MIA GM, and an egomaniac owner who knows less about hockey than Gary Bettman, it appears as though it will be another 41 years until we win another Stanley Cup. So, what are the short term options? To save the the Penguins and move them to the new Barclays Center in Brooklyn! The Penguins are poised to be the next dynasty in sports yet are potentially doomed to be moved to a hillbilly market that will further destroy the image and decrease the popularity of the already floundering NHL. What better for a league in thick turmoil than to move its marquee franchise to the #1 sports market in North America. Think about the profits that could be reaped with Sidney Crosby playing in the #1 media market? With all of Mario Lemieux's concerns in buidling a new arena, he should turn to Brooklyn-the new Nets arena, the Frank Gehry designed Barclays Center will be ready for business in three seasons when the Penguins biggest starts will only be still in their early 20s!Imagine the country's most promising franchise and one of hockey's most exciting teams ever playing in New York City in the most state of the art building in the country. The possibilities are endless.